So we did our portfolio presentations yesterday and it was kind of anxiety party x a million. I don’t entirely know what my problem is (ok that is a lie). Basically me + speaking in front of people + talking about my own work = I have zero confidence ever can I please go lie under a rock now. A part of me thinks it might be healthy to talk to someone about it. Because no matter how many times people tell me I am good enough, I never fully believe it. And that is kind of sad. But ok! Less poor me, more photos!
I have to go to work in a bit, which bums me out, but I’ve been looking at some different calls for entries and I think I might have to make a go of it. I went to school some other times for some other things and never really did anything with it, but now I feel a bit like things are coming together. Although to be 100% honest, if I had unlimited money I would probably go to school forever. There are so many other things I’d love to learn: more art history, more tapestry, different techniques, things outside of textiles.
I should have found a way to add the word “Tuesday” to the title as well, SO MUCH ALLITERATION. Do you love it?
So once upon a time I was like “yes I will weave a tapestry of Jupiter, it’ll be great” without realizing that it is way too hard to get the right colours without spending a whole wack of time dyeing stuff. By the way, time is not really a thing I have a lot of. So I am toughing it out, and am now aiming to work at least one hour per day on this monstrosity. Probably more though. I somehow have to fit about 40 hrs of weaving in between now and the 27th. I’m not even going to list the other things I have to do because I might have a panic attack about it.
Maine went out to Maple Ridge tonight so I put on a movie I wanted to watch without having to worry if he’d whine about it and then tapestrized for two hours.
Is it funnier in Italian? I think maybe? I couldn’t find an English clip of it that wasn’t other people dancing.
By the way, I can hardly believe school is done soon. I am both excited and kinda scared. I don’t want this to be like the other times I went to school where afterward I could only get a job where I worked in an office forever and felt sad. But I think if I want to be a for real artist I will just have to work really hard and grow a thick skin and learn how to not feel the worst ever if I get rejected. Eeeek.
